Saturday, March 22, 2014

Life is Good

A few nights ago, as I was doing Jack's bedtime routine, I had one of those moments that you wait for as a mama. Those few seconds or minutes where you feel like your life is so good, and what you are doing is so good. No life is perfect - we all have struggles and challenges - but in moments like this one, you experience gratitude and pride and so much love.

This moment was me holding Jack in my arms, rocking him and starting to sing "Hail Mary.." like we do every night (and like we've done since he was just a few months old). I paused for just a second after singing, "Mary" and he jumped in. All on his own. In his little toddler voice, he said, "Full of Grace." Except that it came out more like "FUUUULLL of GWWWACE." I just melted. And nearly cried. And then I wondered if John heard him (the baby monitor was on) because I didn't want him to miss out on this moment. I'm so proud of the little boy Jack has become and I know we are just barely getting started with that sweet child.

He and Liam fill my heart with so much joy and love and peace. They've made me into this person that I never thought I could be, and I know they will continue to refine me each day that I have with them. I feel so blessed that at 26 years old I have these two wonderful boys who are a part of my life, every moment of every day. 

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Back in the Game

I am officially back in the game as a working mama! This week was a short one, because I went back Tuesday morning instead of Monday. Which means I spent my Monday afternoon doing this...

I love the bored look on Liam's face. He's like, "Mom, really? More of this stupid iPhone? So over it." Whenever I try to catch him laughing or smiling (photo/video) he instantly stops! I guess he just wants to save his absolute cuteness for us instead of the internet world?

I guess I didn't spend my whole Monday afternoon just hanging with Liam and Jack though. I also sorted through hundreds and hundreds of emails trying to clean up my corporate inbox. It took forever but did put me much more at ease when I arrived at my little cubicle on Tuesday at 8:07 am!

The first day flew by - at first I was flooded by this massive feeling of just being BEHIND. Like the last runner in the race. Think of that really pathetic person you saw in the last summer Olympics. That was me. Actually no one who makes it to the Olympics is pathetic in any way, so just think of me... a non-runner... at the end of a race. Which is not a fun place to be, no matter who you are, but if you are a type A corporate is definitely not a fun place to be. On top of that feeling, and having to pump (ugh! how did I manage to feed my first child only breastmilk for 6 months?) I also realized just a few hours in that what I missed most was the physical affection of my little boys - their hugs and kisses and snuggles. The holding hands and being followed to the "potty" by Jack and having Liam in my arms 99.7% of the day. I felt so alone at the office (even though I was surrounded by great colleagues) because no one was tugging at me, reaching for me, holding on to me. But I really do love my job and I'm so happy to be back doing something that I love. By the end of the day I felt so accomplished. And I couldn't wait to head home and see my boys!

By day two, I figured out that one thing that really helps me get through the work day is the pure quality time that I get with them in the evening. I'm also trying to build some of that time in every morning by waking up earlier (which is hard for me, because I am a person who seriously needs my beauty sleep to function). I don't want to rush them, or myself, and risk heading into the office feeling like I didn't have time for hugs and kisses and snuggles. So we've got a pretty good routine set up with a very early alarm and I think this life of ours is quite manageable for the time being. Especially because of this...


Honestly nothing puts me in a better mood in the morning (I seem to always wake up on the wrong side of the bed. But I'm working on it!) than a homemade latte. John's the best barista because he knows exactly how I love my coffee and I don't have to get dressed or wait in line before I get my caffeine. I am so blessed to have my husband support me so much (& I'm trying to work on actually telling him that more often). Everyone at the office was pretty impressed when mid-afternoon, flowers arrived (c/o Mr. John Flynn). I have to admit it made me feel really, really loved and appreciated.

A cheery bouquet from my sweet husband. It really brightens up my little cubicle!
So after three days in and with one day to go, I have to say what gets me through each day is definitely knowing that I am working hard for these guys (pictured below, in case you are confused about the guys I'm referring to). I love coming home and seeing their smiling faces (they always wake up on the right side of the bed and stay that way all day!). I am truly blessed and really look forward to what the future brings for our family. 

My guys hanging out on the front lawn before dinner!

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Back to reality!

It's been awhile since I've posted because we've been pretty busy lately! But now it is back to reality after a great trip to Texas to see friends (surprise birthday gift :)). I also return to work on Tuesday which I am really looking forward to, especially since my dear youngest child finally relented and is taking a bottle like a champ (thanks to my mother's continual prayers, and my husband's persistence, if you ask me!). 

I guess another reason I haven't had the time/motivation/desire to blog is because I've really just been enjoying reading OTHER blogs! Things like this mean that most of my favorite bloggers are posting lots of new material, which I love. And I started using the Bloglovin' app which feels like it was built exactly for someone like me. I like following other blogs but hate getting an email for each one letting me know there is a new post (who has the time/energy to open, and then delete, all of those emails?) so I love that I can just open the app and read a few blogs when I want to!

Anyway, here's a quick update from us. Or more accurately a quick photo dump. (Mostly of Liam because he was my #1 guy for the past week!)

Liam was an absolute champ as we made our way through Texas visiting friends, old professors, and stopping at every delicious restaurant we could find. He was a pretty smiley/happy boy, and it was so fun to have him with me the entire time. He did great in his car seat/stroller/sling/Ergo and I still feel so blessed that he is so easygoing. I told my friends on a few occasions that I really believe this baby is like a natural anti-depressant. He fills me with so much joy and if I'm feeling sad or tired for some reason, with just one look at his face, I am instantly revived.

But after a great little vacation, one of the many reasons I am so glad to be home is that I don't have to nurse in public so often! I literally felt like I was nursing my way through the massive state of Texas. Luckily my dear friend Colleen was with me most of the time and she's also breastfeeding so we made it a team effort. :) This chubby boy had his meals in a variety of locations which was great for him and an exercise in sacrificial love for me.

We did so many fun things while we were away! I loved this food truck park in Fort Worth, where I got avocado fries (literally deep fried avocado slices), a yummy gyro, and a strawberry basil lemonade. I felt like Liam was quite the attraction in the Ergo. An Australian guy even stopped me to ask, "What's that baby doing in there?" (Sleeping, thank goodness!)

I guess another development is that little Liam boy has been trying to roll over for the past week! He still hasn't completed the move but he loves being on his side. He's at an age that I just love - he's so happy to play on the floor, in our arms, or anywhere else! He's getting sturdier (not such a floppy newborn) but isn't too wriggly to manage (no major lunging, diving, etc. yet).

Here's our big boy at 11 weeks. I can't believe how quickly time is passing! He went to daycare for an hour this past Friday so we could practice with the bottle and they said they already love him so much. :) We do too!!!